Why children need to see adults role model - Dandelion Training & Development

After years of working with children and their families, one of the key aspects of developing life skills that children require is watching their parents do the things that they are struggling with. Let’s look at some examples:

Want children to step out of their comfort zone?

When did your child last see YOU do something uncomfortable and push yourself?
When did your child last see you challenge yourself to learn something new?
When did your child last see you persevere at something hard?
When did your child last see you overcome a challenge?

Want children to develop stronger social skills?

When does your child see you socialise?
How does your child see you socialise?
When does your child see you instigate social interactions?
Which types of social interactions does your child see you part of?
Does your child see both parents do this, or only one?

Want children to apply themselves?

When did your child see you double down and concentrate on something?
When did your child last see you persevere at a task to completion?
When did your child last see you start a task, get frustrated and still continue?

Want your child to have more confidence?

When did your child last hear you talk positively about yourself?
When did your child see you share a win or something that you were proud of yourself for?
When did your child see you talking highly about yourself?
How does your child see you act? are you going after things you want to achieve or bowing down?

Want your child to be more grateful?

Does your child hear you moan or express gratitude for what you have?
When does your child see you acknowledge and thank others for helping them?
Does your child see you behave gracious or irritated if things are not done as you want them, but been done?

Want your child to help more?

Does your child see everyone in the household contribute?
Does your child see both parents (where applicable) engaging in household tasks?
Do you ask for things to be done, and step in if not done soon enough?
Does your child see us engage in these activities?

When we think about role modelling, we are considering that our behaviours are SHOWING children how to interact, behave or engage in the world around them on a subconscious level. Where children see parents, siblings, family members or friends engage in things we are able to offer them evidence of them being possible, however, where there is no information to support what is being done it can take longer to achieve. Consider that adage that ‘their sports teacher/neighbour/coach said it and they just did it’ – rarely has it been different, it was just role modelled or delivered in a different way which made it feel achievable.

There is never a one size fits all approach, but considering how, when and by whom children see things role modelled can add some great fuel to motivation and engagement.

Want to learn more?

Would you like to deliver emotional literacy interventions in your work? Our Level 3 Emotional Literacy Mentor qualification takes you through the theory and practice to deliver emotional literacy support for children aged 3-12 years. You can start today by joining (click here)

Are you looking for a deeper understanding of child mental health? Our Level 4 Child and Adolescent Mental Health Coaching Diploma takes you into an in depth dive of child mental health and how you can support. You can join our Level 4 training (here).

Further help

For more articles about mental health visit – ARTICLES

To learn more about child and adolescent mental health visit – COURSES

For resources to support child and adolescent mental health visit –RESOURCES