Fight

Fight – Flight – Freeze – Fawn

Many people are familiar with the concept of the fight – flight response. When our central nervous system involuntary responds to a perceived threat, an acute stress response kicks in and each individual, depending on their own programming will respond accordingly.

Fight or flight, in its simplest form, is a survival response. On the perception of threat (real or perceived) the body creates a physiological response and activates the sympathetic nervous system, which releases hormones accordingly. These hormones prepare the body to respond to the threat, either to:

Step up and fight it (FIGHT)
To run away and get to safety (FLIGHT)

Think back, to pre-historic times, and imagine you are a caveman, going about your daily tasks, when a triceratops comes out of nowhere. The sight of this danger activates the sympathetic nervous system, which quickly releases cortisol and adrenaline into the body, which sends all blood to your limbs (and away from your organs) ready to fight it off and protect your home, or to run as fast as possible to safety until it has passed. The system is automatic, involuntary and is unconscious in it’s reaction.

As time has passed, and we have developed a deeper understanding of the body’s reactions, further categories have been added. After all, not all children (and adults) run or fight in a threatening situation. Our reactions to threats are all different, and understanding them can help us develop a deeper understanding of ourselves. The purpose of each response is to minimise or remove themselves from the threat which they are faced with. The body wants to return to the parasympathetic nervous system which is calm and neutral.

Fight – Step up and fight it off
Flight – Run away to safety
Freeze – Unable to move, act or respond to a threatening event
Fawn – Trying to appease the conflict, fix it or please others to stop it

So, why do some people react to things, and others don’t?

Our reactions to perceived events of threat may be actual or our body’s response to them. So, there may actually be a threat in front of us (for instance, someone threatening us) or our body may react to an event and feel it cannot cope (for example, hearing screaming and thinking it is dangerous).

Our reactions depend on situations, such as:

Our ability to manage stress
Our understanding of our ability to manage a stressor
Our perception of an event
Our resilience levels
Our tolerance to stress
Our sensitivity to stress hormones
Our ability to activate the prefrontal lobes (reasoning, logic, problem solving)
Previous life events – such as witnessing domestic violence, abuse, bullying etc

The fight response is a reaction to fight against the threat we are faced with (real or perceived). The body signals to react to the problem. This could be:

Being told something we do not want to hear
Being in a situation which feels threatening
Hearing aggressive or threatening conversations
Being around people who are arguing

A child or teenager with a fight response may:

Square up or threatened aggressive behaviours
Lash out or hit / kick
Have a tight jaw
Have clenched fists
Cry or scream
Attack the perceived threat
Struggling to breathe
Throwing things
Complain of stomach aches or upset stomachs
Stalk or get into the personal space of another person
Aggravate a situation by taunting
Glare at others

Flight

The flight response means that someone feels that they cannot win against the threat, so remove themselves from it as quickly as possible.

The child or teenager might:

Be excessively fidgety or not be able to stay still
Be on the move constantly
Be restless and unable to relax
Have twitching legs / arms
Have darting eyes
Be watching the door or asking where the exit is
Be moving towards the door / windows
Running without consideration of safety

Freeze

The freeze response occurs where a child or teenager does not fight or flight and instead freezes to the spot. They do not know how to respond to the threat, so their body instead shuts down to protect itself. A child may describe themselves as being ‘stuck’ ‘frozen’ and may be completely unresponsive.

A child may:

Be withdrawn
Be unresponsive
Holding their breath
Being shut down or dissociating
Be vacant / have a vacant expression
Feel stiff, heavy, cold or numb or empty
Become pale
Complain of their heart being loud or hard
Be unable to move
May not react to your voice / touch / instructions

Fawn

The fawn response is a reaction which occurs when a child or teenager feels that their only chance of reducing the threat is to please it. The fawn response wants to avoid all conflict and therefore they will accommodate everyone else’s needs in place of their own. The child may have:

Experienced abuse
Experienced neglect
Been subjected to or witnessed violence
Have a parent or carer/s who are narcissistic

Therefore, they may be hyper-vigilant to other people’s needs and desires, and have difficulty or feel guilty for expressing their needs or accepting help.

The child may be:

Overly agreeable
Being extremely helpful
Try to calm a situation
Beg / plead
Trying to people please
Excessive caring for others
Unable to unwilling to express their emotions . thoughts or feelings
Unable to say no
Dissociation

How can we use this to help children?

Being aware of the reactions that different children have can help us:

Identify triggers and stressors
Put in place emotional regulation strategies to calm the response (see our mental health care plans)
Integrate somatic soothing activities into children’s routines (see our mental health care plans)
Implement stress reduction activities into our routines
Enhance executive functioning and cognitive skills
Access therapeutic help for children

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Further help

For more articles about mental health visit – HERE

To learn more about child mental health visit – HERE

For resources to support child mental health visit – HERE